Digital Binky

How many of us use our devices to avoid things we need to address or take action on? The stress in life can be so intense that we just self-soothe with a few hours of scrolling. But what that does subconsciously is actually more damaging, ultimately releasing more cortisol (stress hormones) and creating inner storms we don't even realize we are creating. This leads to inflammation, headaches, body pain, anxiety, and more stress. 

They even have a name for it - doom scrolling

For some, attachment to  phones isn't the issue. There are lots of unhealthy coping strategies out there, but for now let's focus on the issue of turning to our devices to self-soothe, rather than turning to God about our deepest desires. 

And as you think about attachment to phones, think about those closest to you as well. Like what about your spouse? Are you noticing your spouse's need to check the social media statuses instead of dealing with something in the home or being fully present?  I want to encourage you to GENTLY check in to see what your spouse needs. Reading between the lines, if you will, to get a sense of what your spouse is seeking through the phone because maybe they feel it's lacking in the home.

Don't let each other spin out. Talk to one another, learn each other's deepest anxiety, doubts, and innermost insecurities, so that you can battle that in prayer together.  

Trying to scroll our worries away does nothing but waste our time and make us feel worse. 

Couple scrolling on phones

I’ve had this blogpost topic planned for over a month now, and ironically enough it's the same week that Facebook, Instagram, and What’s App had a massive outage! I heard about it while on a work call and my poor colleague was panicking about it! His reason was for the business he is trying to promote and run, but it really opened my eyes to truly see just how reliant we are on these social media platforms in general. 

We have been studying Numbers and learning how God came alongside Moses as he went through the wilderness of Sinai and others, headed to the Promised Land. God gave instruction after instruction (and they were quite specific) like a father gives a son before he reaps a great reward.

There were so many rebellious people and what they didn’t understand was that these God-given instructions or laws were to protect them and were given out of love for them. The people didn’t realize that ultimately these laws were to help them love one another. 

What if we apply these God-given instructions to our lives today? Here are some we talk about in our family often...

Galatians 5:22-23 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. 

Matthew 22:36-40 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Genesis 2:24  Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

When I scroll social media, I am often heartbroken by the rebellion I see and the incredible influence it can have on so many as it is spread via social media. But then I read Numbers, and I am heartbroken by the rebellion I see and the incredible influence it had on so many as it spread in the desert. 

So I just want to give you a word of encouragement and reminder…. God is big enough to handle it all. We can put on the Armor of God for the world in which WE currently are living in, and pray that God touch the hearts of those that rebel and are lost. We can also pray that God uses us to be a light in the dark, and we know that sin is present and there is an evil one at work here. 

I also want to invite and challenge you to be mindful of the reason for your scroll…is it for entertainment, connection, or avoidance of something? If your answer is avoidance, take that burden to the Lord. He’s waiting to walk through the desert with you. 

I’m grateful for “the great blackout of 2021” because we can talk about setting digital boundaries all day...but having some of our favorite apps literally not function gave us an opportunity to check in with how attached we are to them. How much time, energy, and space we really are giving to these devices? To ask ourselves, have they become our digital binkies? 

How will you and your spouse walk alongside one another, united, with God as your refuge? 

deeply connected married couple without distraction

Lovingly check in with them today to see if this is an area you could grow in as a couple.❤️🙏🏼

1 comment

  • Mandy – You are so right. I don’t scroll social as much as some people I’m sure but do find myself lost in it occasionally, wondering how long I’ve been on my phone. And, what’s going on around me that I’ve missed. I’m all about the “look up and be present” although as you pointed out, can mean dealing with something that is hard. But if you don’t deal with the hard thing, it won’t go away. Take it all to God.

    Susan Dawson

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